You’ve probably been married to her for eons…
A big ball and chain around your leg (or throat)…
So why not buy her a diamond that matches her heart.
A black heart diamond that’s almost a total replica.
She’s not been the nicest person. No. You may have gone deaf purposefully. Sure. But she’s still yours… Every nag, every complain, every squawk from her maleficent head. So get her a diamond she deserves. Something dark, evil, and lifeless…
Just like this black heart diamond below:
|CARAT, COLOR, INTENSITY, CERTIFICATE||PRICE||VIEW|
|3.04, BLACK, FANCY, GIA||$6,030||VIEW|
A real beauty, isn’t it?
Soulless, hard as a rock, and made from earth’s fire and brimstone.
It doesn’t matter if her name is Cruella, Lizzie, Medusa, Ursula, or Mystique, it’s all the same.
Dire, dark, and full of gloom.
Just like your relationship, the love of your life, death itself.
Buy her something that really represents her very essence. Her reason to breath (or rasp). A heart. A big and black heart that lasts forever. Just like the curse she brought into your life.
See it here at James Allen, and show her what she really means.
Every point. Every facet. Every polished girdle and base…
Of course, you know I’m just jesting. It is April Fools after all. But April Fools or not, this is a real diamond, and you can really buy it.
So whether it matches her heart, well, that’s for you to decide.
She may be a little goth. Right? Nothing wrong with that. Unless it comes with a crooked nose and a wart…
All in all, enjoy the day, we all need a good laugh.
14k Wheat Chains